Love Story Excerpt

If anyone is curious, I'll be posting about a five page excerpt of the love story I'm writing later this evening to Always feel free to offer up any constructive criticism you may have to any of my writing. In terms of strictly my word count goal, I'm close to sixty percent complete. I CAN'T WAIT!!!!!!!
I'll probably look tomorrow morning before hitting the libraries and having tea with a Russian friend.

Keep going! ^_^

The Russian friend who snogged me (different from my tea friend) made me identify what part I disliked of Gogol, which made me reread Dead Souls and actually understand it, so he made me realise I love it.
Nice. Hope that you like what's there at least. It's still somewhat of a draft, there's strengths and weakness but I'm working on pushing the story forward at this point rather than editing. Now I've got to figure out what's wrong with the formatting of the post!!!! Awesome.
Regarding your tale, I'm suffering a little from lack of context... somewhat after July 1943...

I'm assuming Eric is a cis-male on the Allied side? I haven't considered WWII for around seven years - distracted by the twentieth-century Chinese/Japanese war which included the Nanjing Massacre, the Cold War which still invokes distrust between Russians and US citizens, and the Greek/Persian war in Xenophon's Anabasis @_@now I need to grasp more of the Persian side of the last one! I am talking with a friend from that area on Sunday. I've been focused on the Greek side since Xenophon is a Greek historian - but there must be a story behind the other side, too! It is on the ancient side.

Aww, your prose definitely incurs a sense of pathos! ♥ Thank you for letting me read what you've been up to. I am returning to the Library Pratchett's Carpe Jugulum, Oscar Wilde's Importance of Being Earnest, Gogol's Dead Souls, and Sachs' End of Poverty today - I'm still in the middle of Pasternak's Doctor Zhivago, George Eliot's Middlemarch, Harris' Suicide of Reason, Stephenson's Snow Crash, a collection of Baudelaire's poetry, and Pinker's How the Mind Works, besides last night I was putting myself to sleep making my way through Marx's Capital. It's important and useful for economics! It's just a 19th-century yawner.
I agree that a random excerpt like this may be difficult to follow as you would have no idea what's happening!! With this being the ending to the fourth chapter, there are already about fifty pages to this point. I wonder what to do then in such a scenario? Maybe add a short contextual paragraph preceding the post?

Great! I'm currently reading a much less intellectual novel, haha. While It Lasts by Abbi Glines.

Thanks for the input Claire!!
Yes, that would help, if you want a deeper critique than grammar and spelling, both of which I think you have just fine.

Intellectual things are hard to read and sometimes I would rather sleep. That's why I read Marx last night.
Sea Breeze, book 3? It says that's a bestseller! I looked at my Uni library today for a paper copy of Marx's Capital Volume 1, since non-electronic books are easier for me to read, to only find 2 & 3.
1 is about three times the size of 2 and 3, so now I have a better grasp of what a monstrosity I've happened across. @_@

You're welcome ^_^; I don't think I gave very useful feedback.
Well Abbi Glines is actually an interesting story. From what I can tell, she initially self published and sold around 1 million books. Since that time, she's signed with a division of Simon and Schuster. I always like to hear success stories like that. I'm about 50% done with the Sea Breeze story, I like to read books that have sold well to compare them with my own writing.

I am 6% through Snow Crash, 4% the Russian Communism book, 2% Middlemarch, 7% the Islamic book my significant other is interested in, 30% Doctor Zhivago (which he had ensured I got in Russian), 2% Lowry's Gathering Blue (in the same realm as The Giver), 13% through Capital (IT TAKES FOREVER DAMN 19TH CENTURY WHOODLING AROUND THE POINT), 55% of the way through Beowulf, 12% through Dennett, 31% of the way through my GRE book (I'm crying at one kind of math question now T_T), and it's not really worth calculating anything else.